Episode 2 – First Day Teaching English in Italy
Chaos, “Pizza” Kids, and the Revenge of the Madrelingua
If you think your first day at work was bad, wait until you hear what happened to me on my first day teaching English in Italy.
📌 Spoiler: it involves a kid named “Pizza,” another called “FIFA,” and a teacher glued to her phone.
🎧 Want the full, uncut story? Click here to listen to the episode now
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Finding the Classroom Was Just the Beginning
New job. New country.
First-year Italian middle school.
No one speaking English, and me refusing to speak Italian (my secret madrelingua weapon had to stay hidden).
The bell rang. Showtime.
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The Door Opens… and Chaos Hits
I knocked.
The answer? Animal noises, shouting, and what sounded like opera.
Inside:
• Paper flying everywhere
• Kids running like it was recess on steroids
• One boy strolling around eating a sandwich like he owned the place
And the teacher? Scrolling her phone.
🎧 Hear exactly how I handled this chaos → Listen to the full episode here
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“Sei la madrelingua?” – AKA: Good Luck, It’s Your Problem Now
I looked to the teacher for help. She shrugged: “Sei la madrelingua?”
Translation: It’s your circus now.
I grabbed the marker and wrote:
“Good morning! My name is Ory and I’m English!”
For a second, silence.
Then giggles.
One boy whispered, “Ch’ha detto questa?”
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Meet Pizza, FIFA, and Friends
“What’s your name?” I asked.
“Pizza.” 🍕
“Mindcraft.”
“FIFA.” 🎮
The rest? A list of video games and random English words.
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The Hijack & The Plan
Suddenly, the Italian teacher stood up.
Not to help, but to start her own lesson — in Italian.
I blinked. Was this a prank?
Somewhere between Pizza and the paper planes, I started to smile.
Not because I liked it… but because I was plotting my revenge.
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Revenge of the Madrelingua
As the bell rang, I made a promise:
These kids would learn English — whether they liked it or not.
And by the end of the year, they’d remember me for more than “Pizza.”
📌 Curious about my wicked plan for lesson two?
🎧 Listen to Episode 2 now and find out exactly what happens next
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💬 Join the Conversation
What would you have done on your first day teaching English in Italy?
Leave a comment below and tell me your craziest classroom story!
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